The Runger Games

Do you feel it? Coming in the air tonight? Hold on... it's The Runger. 

If you've never experienced it, the Runger is that special kind of hunger that runners get when training distances and intensity picks up. It strikes predictably (at dawn, shortly after long runs) and randomly (before bed, 2 hours after a large meal, 3 am).

The Runger Games: a battle that can't be won through traditional tactics.

You may feel compelled to forage for grains and fruits (in your mother's fridge), or hunt for your own meat (at the fast food restaurant across the street).

Your friends and family will be drawn into the Games as your mood swings violently and unpredictably. The lack of a banana before a run is a near tragedy. You may sit in your boyfriend's car close to tears because it's 5pm, you ran 11 miles that morning and have consumed less than 1000 calories so far. Problem solving ability is thrown out the window.

The pendulum swings back. Belly full of carbs and protein. Target acquired and all is right with the world. You have a perfect beer to top it off and are now able to have cheerful conversation with the non-insane adults around you.

Tips to winning the RUNGER GAMES:

1. (If you are not a runner) VOLUNTEER. Make sure your runner is stocked with what they need: bananas, post-race pretzels, protein shakes for emergency post-run calories, fruit and carb food snacking.

2. (As the runner) PREPARE: While it's nice if someone takes care of you, it really is on your shoulders to get these things together. Even if your car is down and you're lazy as all get out. Don't blame others for your lack of preparation.

3. IMPROVISE: You won't always have what you want to soothe the savage beast in your belly. If you want a banana and toast, but don't have fresh food, make oatmeal and have frozen fruit. You can do it. You're a runner. Suck it up.

Beware the Fatniss Everdeen if you always give in to the RUNGER

I promised more about my runner's body and being an achiever, and it's still coming. I'm slogging through summer and making it so far. 

PLEASE consider donating to my Marine Corps Marathon Fundraising Efforts for Epilepsy Therapy Project

Choices... and the wizards who inspire us

Welcome to July - the dog days of summer, steamy, sweaty, perfect running weather if you find yourself over-hydrated and masochistic. 

While my blogging and working have been on vacation, my running has not been. I'll admit to missing a run or two due to jet lag, severe thunderstorms, and the ongoing saga that is my OLD car. Oh, and least excusable: delaying a long run due to a pub pedal/crawl the day before, as my nutrition consisted of beer, a bloody mary, wasabi peas, spicy salty mix and wheat thins. Runners/walkers/humans can assume this isn't ideal pre-run fuel.

To catch up without detailing every run in the past few weeks, here's a takeaway lesson from my Summer Safari group. My team lead gave us this quote: A very credible running coach, Alberto Salazar, was once asked "What is the biggest mistake average runners make?' He answered 'Running the slow runs too fast and the fast runs too slow." 

So I've slowed down, especially on the long weekend runs and it's made all the difference. I can't bring myself to discuss how slow my pace is, but it's comfortable, I'm able to finish the increasing distances and I don't have cramps, side-aches or feel terribly out of breath. It's glorious. 

However, my consistently slow pace and the runs that I have missed have left me feeling unsettled, especially when I stack myself up against the mileage and pace of others. It's time to step back and let some wiser people take the reigns.

"It is our choices Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities." -- Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets.

"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us." -- Lord of the Rings

I have many natural abilities, and I could list them all here, but you would then see that like running, humility is also not one of them. However, as my favorite Headmaster said, it's not my innate abilities that prove my worth, but how I choose to work what I have. I don't have long legs or quick turnover. But I can choose to spend my time pounding the pavement, trail and track to build strength, stamina and perhaps even speed (all things are relative, m'kay?).

Gandalf's onto something. Despite a bad situation or our lot in life, we can't squander the time we've been gifted with. So I dragged by ass out of bed at 5am and chose to spend that time running in the muggy summer heat. Because I can. Because I want to. Because these moments and choices are proving who I am. 

I'll sign off here, with the promise that I have a bit more to say on this topic. 
Coming up next time: a runner's body and becoming an achiever.

Fables... the grasshopper and the tortiose

My first experiences with road races were in the late 1980s or early 90s, when my dad started running 5k races. Now that I do the math, he was a lot closer to my current age than I'd like to admit publicly (maybe than he'd like me to admit as well). Those early Saturday mornings at the Snug Harbor Kick-Off to Summer,  Seaway Run or Roosevelt Park Days 5k are bit hazy, but I do remember my mom calling the front of the pack "rabbits." You know, those guys who run 17, 16, 15-something minute 5k races. They may or may not be Tiggers (you know, us bouncy folk), but they are certainly the rabbits - out there, at the front, winning the race.

As you've probably guessed, I'm not a rabbit. At least not as a runner. I've claimed to have the pace of a geriatric dairy cow, and no one has ever challenged me on this. However, this image brought to mind one junior high summer spent at Muskegon Civic Theater's Summer Children's Theater. We were putting on a production of a number of Aesop's (and other) fables including "Belling the Cat," "The Lion and the Mouse," "The Milkmaid and her Pail," "The Ant and the Grasshopper," and of course, "The Tortoise and the Hare."  

With these and several other skits, the small cast each had several parts. Several decades later, I don't remember all my parts, but two skits and two roles stand out in particular. One is the tale of the Ant and Grasshopper. The Ant was industrious and worked hard all summer, setting aside food for the winter. He was very sure to remind the Grasshopper (yours truly) multiple times that she should do the same, or she would have nothing to eat and would suffer a most terrible fate. To which the Grasshopper replied "I'd rather SING!!!" and then proceeded to tap dance and sing arias, sparkling antennae bopping along . I've been a spotlight hog and dork since way back. Having danced and sang all summer, when the cold and snow finally arrives (it must have been April in Michigan), the Grasshopper begs the Ant to share his food. In an act of  charity, she is promptly turned down and has a fabulous death scene. I believe it was my first and only death scene to date.

The other skit that sticks me with me is the story of the Tortoise and the Hare. My friend Jason played the Tortoise and had a great turtle costume. He spent the entire five minute scene plodding along the stage singing: 

"You've got to keep on, keeping on. That's how it begins. You've got to keep on, keeping on. Slow and steady wins." 

Jason (probably) won't be offended if I say how ridiculously cheesy it was. But so AWESOME.

We all know the story. The hare teases him, runs circles around him and eventually burns out. The tortoise wins through perseverance and patience.  

In the world of running and work, there is much to be learned from the ant, the tortoise, and yes - even the grasshopper. Successful people work hard, set goals and make steady progress. They recognize the pitfalls of starting out quickly and flaming out too soon. They know that luck favors the prepared (ha ha) and strive to be prepared.

Those back-of-the-packers like me know that no amount of perseverance will cause us to win a marathon. I run 12 minute miles. No amount of training and "keeping on" will bring me to the finish line, 26.2 miles away, in 2:40. The Rabbits are the Rabbits because they have long legs, the right genetics, but also the preparation of the ant and the perseverance of the tortoise. They are not Hares. 

But in our quest to improve our 5k, 10k or half-marathon times, better ourselves and further our careers, let's not forget once in awhile to chuck it all, throw on the tap shoes, the sequined antennae and burst forth with "I'd rather SING!!!" 

If I find actual pictures from Summer Children's Theater, I will  post them!

Here comes the singing Grasshopper!!!

On standing still

The title of this blog post was from my failed post on the Boston Marathon bombing of last week - and how we can't hide ourselves away from the scary things in the world, how even though the world is not safe, it is important to continue to move forward, and that standing still gets us nowhere. Like I said on Facebook last week, I couldn't write a coherent post on Boston so I didn't - but the title remains.

I just keep looking at it: "On standing still" and think about how paralyzing fear is. How hypocritical it is for me to demand that the world get out and get running in the face of fear and danger and then cower beneath the covers of my own bed when I'm feeling uncertain. For you runners out there - do you map your run (.com?) before you set out, or do you just let your feet take you where they will? Have you ever turned a blind corner, knowing it may be a dead-end, a steep hill, or rocky terrain? If you *are* a mapper - like I am - what do you do when the route isn't as expected? I love knowing exactly what to expect, when to turn around, what my pace is and if I keep that pace up, just how soon I can be home for a snack and a potty break.

Obviously life is not a smoothly mapped run. Even a smoothly mapped run is not so smooth. Songs get stuck on repeat, you get a hot spot on your arch that turns into the cutest, more terrible heart-shaped blister, your thighs rub together until they look like you took a cheese grater to them, or you hit your favorite trail, only to discover it was washed out in a recent rainstorm.

I'm stuck and standing still right now. I feel like I can see the things I want but I don't know how to get there. The bridge is washed out, to use a worn out metaphor. Dang, I hate worn out metaphors. How about this one: (For some reason) I'm trying to get to Mordor and I can't find a way around this bog filled with the ghosts of the past?  So instead of pushing ahead, I'm hovering in the sidelines, feeling like I'm watching life happen around me - because it's easier and less scary than choosing the path less taken and having it make all the difference (badly).

Dude... We're trying to... WHERE?

Oh yeah, if you haven't figured out yet, my two biggest fears are failure and disappointing people. So it makes it paralyzing to make hard, scary choices. So now what? I guess I should run, keep running and try to clear my head a bit before the morning, because this is not a productive line of thinking.

Conquer your fears

Feel free to donate to my efforts: Marine Corps Marathon Fundraising for Epilepsy Therapy Project